dark beige

The Odeon automated listings service advises on all your personal problems


INTEREST IN FASHION LED TO NIGHT OF STOLEN PASSION


Dear Odeon Cineline,

Last week I went out into town to see my daughter Jane's student fashion show. She's just graduating and as part of her degree, they have to put on a professional style catwalk show. When I arrived, I was immediately struck by how handsome Jeff the course tutor was, and we soon got chatting, with a definite flirtation in the air. However, I noticed a wedding ring and thought nothing more of it.

But as the wine flowed and the show was a big hit, I couldn't help but notice that me and Jeff were really getting on very well indeed. Before I knew it, I was back at his, making mad, passionate love. But after we'd finished he said his wife would be back any minute, and that I had to go. I was so hurt, and spent the night in tears at his brutish behaviour. Nevertheless, I just can't get him out of my head now - what do I do?

Sarah, Barnsley


Dear Sarah,

I think you are calling for the Odeon Manchester - is that correct? If so, press 1. If not, press 2. To hear these options again, press 3.

KIDNAP PLOT = MENTAL ROT

Dear Odeon Cineline,
I done a terrible thing, and now everyone knows. I tried to plot a kidnap of me own daughter, with me cousins and uncles, to make money from the public like them posh ones in Portugal and that nice family on that TV show. Now everyone hates me and I want to kill myself. Is it too late to pray?

Karen, Dewsbury


Dear Karen,
I'm sorry, I didn't quite catch that. Please say the name of the Odeon you are calling for. For example, say "Manchester".