It's the darnedest, funniest thing - I used to be a rock star, but now I'm a cheese making farmer!
I don't know quite how it happened (it's a bit of a Blur!, lol), but one day I put down the rolled up note and picked up a rake. I stopped snorting lines and started eating cheese and wines, I gave up smoking crack, and started scoffing brie on crackers.
Back then, the only bag of South America's finest I was interested in was small, white and made of cocaine. But now, it might be some rare Argentinian Jarlsberg, or something.
I've put down the groupies and pick up the Gruyere - who'd have thunk it? Not me, not me.
I live in the country and I've got a family. I used to be a cunt, and now I'm still a cunt, but a cunt who makes cheese.