Tuesday 2nd June, 7.27pm
Lisa Hames is gone, Kirsty McBain is disgusting...I need a new muse. Yes, I want to bone Megan Fox more than anything on earth, but I really have to accept that we're not likely to ever meet. Unless her car breaks down in Dayton on the way from Beverly Hills to Hollywood for the Transformers 2 premiere (SATNAV is a bitch), and she ends up asking me for directions. If that ever happens, I won't be naviGAYting, if you know what I'm saying. I'll be giving her clear directions to Al-BONE-ia.
But anyways, that might not happen, so who else is there? No one. Besides all the hot chicks I see every day that I want to bone, but that's another story. In terms of ACTUAL chicks that I can talk to, it's thin on the ground. Or fat on the ground, if you know what Shelley Farnell looks like. I've even started looking at Randy's mom in a new light, and at the end of the day, Randy's ass clown head came out of that vagina. Gross.
But someone who I will NEVER want to bone is that Susan Boyle. She makes me wanna puke. Like "oh wow, she can hit the high notes"; but so what if you never wanna let her near your personal microphone, if you know what I'm saying? I'm glad those kids and that little girl beat her, at least she might grow up to be hot some day. And where was Demi Moore in all of this? Exactly. Too busy boning that ass Kutcher to care. I'm sorry for being so angry. Just really need a girlfriend right now.
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1 Comment
Great blog!
Keep up the good work
Posted on 12 June 2009 at 22:42
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