DARK BEIGE IS BACK >>
Daily comedy website covering celebrities, TV, film, music, characters and more.
We hate you, you're not our real dad
SNEAK PREVIEW: MITCH WINEHOUSE'S JAZZ TRIBUTE TO AMY
"A shooby dooby dooby doo wah, doo wah,
My shooby dooby daughter is dooby dooby dooby doo-dead, doo dead"
More Mitch fun in Dark beige Radio Podcast 28, out next week
WILL SMITH: I WARNED YOU ABOUT HARDCORE DANCE
Back in 92 in my seminal hit, Summertime, I warned you all that "all that hardcore dance has gotten to be a little bit out of control", but you just didn't listen, did you?
19 years later, and it looks like I was right after all.
As the world dances at "raves" to fast digital beats, just look what's happening out there...
The economy in freefall...
Norwegians going nuts...
Singers tragically dying...
Riots in the streets...
And my wife (maybe) boning Marc Anthony.
This would never have happened if you'd all stuck to some slow summer grooves
Remember kids - "it's cool to dance, but what about the groove that soothes that moves romance?"
PETER ANDRE SELLS HIS KIDS ON QVC
"I love them, mate...yours for £3.99...I'll throw in Harvey and call it a fiver"
19 YEAR OLD FROM ESSEX REVEALED AS HACKER...NO RECENT PHOTOS AVAILABLE
The boy....6 years ago
His computer...20 years ago
His home...60 years ago
THIRD BIRTHDAY / ON A BREAK
The Dark Beige blog is now just over three years old.
There have been 2775 posts, 26 podcasts, and over 48,000 tweets; 100 jokes about Jack Tweed, and (amazingly) just 45 about paedophiles.
Am taking a small break from the blog to get new inspiration and enjoy the sunshine. Back soon.
AVRIL FOOLS DAY
"He wasn't a skater boy! She didn't say see you later boy! It was all a joke, ha ha"
CLIMATE CHANGE CAUSES A LEVEL RESULTS TO BLOSSOM 5 MONTHS EARLY
"I got straight A's!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"Shit, it's freezing out here"
TWEED: I WASN'T BEING DISRESPECTFUL
"When I thought about brave Jade, I was awash with grief...so I thought I'd have a wash in this handy hot tub"
GEORGE MICHAEL ASKS FANS TO HELP HIM DO A POO ON TWITTER
Come on! I'm sure together we can all get this to number two!
CONVICTED PAEDOPHILE APOLOGISES FOR 'GIGANTIC ERROR OF JUDGEMENT' IN LENDING FERGIE £15,000
"This is deeply embarrassing...What was I thinking?"
