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We hate you, you're not our real dad
THE CONTINUITY IRA

"We're going to keep bombing until historical inaccuracies like this one are eradicated"
TAKE THAT ARE REFORMING!

It's the news everyone was waiting for - Take That are finally back!
The much loved boyband bowed out at the very top of their powers back on March 13th, when they performed at Comic Relief. Now after much soul searching, and time away from the spotlight to pursue solo projects, the awesome foursome are back, with an amazing new performance planned for March 28th, where they will kickstart a massive whirlwind publicity tour for their comeback with a concert spectacular.

As for whether Robbie will rejoin the band on stage...watch this space!
DR DRE STILL JUST DIPPING THROUGH LA IN HIS CAR, LOST

WHERE THE HELL AM I?
1992: Now let the Chevrolet slide, as I dip a nigga trip to the south side, yeah
Rollin in my six-fo', Check this outThe sun went down when I hit Slausson on my way to the strip, now I'm just flossin
Check in my rearview, cause niggaz they will do jack moves
1999: Clip in the strap, dippin' through hoods (what hoods?)
Compton, Long Beach, Inglewood!
South Central out to the Westside (wessyde)
It's California Love, this California bud got a nigga gang of pub
2009: They see that low rider go by they're, like Oh my!
You ain't got to tell me why you're sick cuz I know why.
I dip through in that six trey like sick em Dre.
I'm an itch that they can't scratch, they're sick of me.
But hey, what else can I say? I love LA.
I HAD AN ARRANGED MARRIAGE

I had to arrange caterers, flowers, guest arrivals, entertainment and much more.
MARLEY AND M.E

Bob Marley's ultra laidback, lazy persona was not infact down to heavy marijuana consumption, as previously thought. It was because he suffered from M.E, the so called "reggae flu".
GUESS WHO'S BACK, BACK AGAIN, JUDI'S BACK, TELL A FRIEND

Judi Dench returns to the stage from injury
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/7962155.stm
JULIAN CASABLANCAS SUFFERS A MILD STROKE

"Is this actually ironic or not? I'm not totally sure. I really don't want to be tarred with that whole Alanis Morissette brush by bloggers at this already difficult time"
More stroke jokes: http://darkbeige.blogspot.com/search?q=stroke
BRAVE JAMES CORDEN PRAISED FOR GETTING DROVES OF YOUNG MEN TO CHECK THEIR TESTICLES FOR LUMPS

"It's his brave legacy"
THIS WEEK IN OK! - JADE'S FIRST INTERVIEW FROM HEAVEN

Speaking to the magazine by Max Clifford approved ouija board, the sad star reveals all about life on the other side:

* I was a bit scared at first, but everyone's been really nice.
* The food is great but you can't get a good English cuppa.
* Everything's all white and cloudy, so I'm glad I had my teeth done.
* Jack hasn't tried to talk to me yet. Jackie has but I can't make out what she's saying.
* I'm going out for lunch with Paul Newman, Heath Ledger and Benazir Bhutto next week.
POPEYE'S DAD SADLY PASSES AWAY AT 90

The normally tough but inarticulate cartoon sailor is said to be "devastated", and has asked for some time for him and Olive Oyl to grieve alone.
R.I.P JADE GOODY

There have been jokes here (16), but it is still sad. She was 3 years younger than me.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/7957852.stm
CRAIG PHILLIPS TO RELEASE HIS AUTOBIOGRAPHY EIGHT AND A HALF YEARS LATE

This is the saddest thing I have read in some time (the announcement, not the book).
http://www.digitalspy.co.uk/showbiz/a150243/bb-winner-craig-to-release-autobiography.html


































