SEAGAL: A RESPONSE

Posted by Posted by Dark Beige On 01:23


By Jean Claude Van Damme


I heard what you were saying Seagal, and I don’t like it one little bit. You seem to be throwing your weight around, and nobody does that round here except me! I’m the king of straight-to-video/cable/airline action movies, not you! I’m gonna have to roundhouse your face if you don’t shut up!


Let me just remind you that I am a KICKBOXER who is an experienced STREET FIGHTER. Fuck with me and it’s your DEATH WARRANT! Just being near me is a MAXIMUM RISK, I’ll KNOCK OFF your head, leading to SUDDEN DEATH.


You’ve got NOWHERE TO RUN if you don’t leave now, so go, get AWOL!


I’m a UNIVERSAL SOLDIER of a TIMECOP. Oh shit, that doesn’t work quite so well.


Erm...do you want to see my ass?


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